Ever felt like life was throwing you one curveball after another? Yeah, me too.

Last weekend I had the honor of speaking at a local wellness summit in Altus, Oklahoma. My talk was called “The Gratitude Glow Up: How to Transform Your Life with Extreme Thankfulness.” 

>>Download my free Gratitude Glow Up Guide

Now, I teach workshops and do speaking gigs fairly often I would say. I am very comfortable being in front of a crowd and am generally pretty much an open book.

However, when I was planning the content for this course I had an intuitive nudge to tell an intimate part of my story from the stage.

For whatever reason this felt very uncomfortable.

I was resistant.

I love helping others connect to themselves. While I throw in lots of personal anecdotes, I rarely share a full-on journey from my own life.  Mostly because I prefer to learn hands on than to hearing stories, but hey - everyone is allowed to have their own learning styles.

After wrestling with this nagging little voice, I decided to give in.

I shared my story.

What felt like a very vulnerable story.

You see, I recently bought a building downtown in my community and the whole thing was magic - start to finish! A total God story, for sure!

Every time my life is in flow I have things unfold for me like this!

I shared this magical gratitude-based story with friends on the California tour and everywhere I went people got really invested in the story and now the journey I’m on with this building!

>>(Several people convinced me to start an IG account for the remodel process, which you can follow here: @TheBohoBuilding.) 

Anywho, I can’t rightfully tell the story of how magically and quickly the building came to me without telling the full story, of 2.5 years of struggle and obstacles and grief and transformation that it took to get there. 

Life looked very different for me 2 years ago. 

Very different.

But I caught a vision that I couldn’t let go of.

I meditated and prayed and the vision only became clearer and louder.

Receiving the Vision in the Midst of Grief

Ultimately, receiving this vision changed my life.

• I left a 6 year partnership.

• I moved back to Oklahoma. 

• I learned a lot about putting myself first so that I can create space to heal others more powerfully.
  

Can I tell you the honest, unglamorous truth?

It’s been a long, hard road. 😩

The last few years have felt HEAVY for me.

If you’ve become familiar with grief, you know that she’s a lady who shows up whenever she wants.

You think she’s gone forever and then boom, she’s at your front door again.

A sweet friend explained it to me like this: you can either give her what she wants or she’ll take it from you later down the road.

It’s better to succumb to the emotions she arouses, and let them out again and again and again. 

When I feel like I’m good, and things are back to normal, here she comes again.

And YALL - I like LIVE in the depths.

I journal daily.

I do deep hypnosis work weekly.

I get healings.

I pull cards.

I paint channeled guidance.

I do rage and sadness rituals.

Tears are my friends.

But the past few years the tears have felt like that annoying fly at a picnic that comes back again and again and again. No matter how much you swat at him - he just won’t leave!

What have I been grieving?

A swirl of it all.

• Losing Dad.

• Leaving behind a lifetime of hopes and dreams for the life I built with my partner.

• Leaving a small town that filled my soul and felt like home for a season.

• The discomfort of shoving my whole life, that once filled a whole beautiful home, into a 12 x 12 room where I now live, create, work and play.

• Having family as a roommate.

It’s starting over.

Which is such an amazing, beautiful feeling that I love.

But with every new beginning, there is an ending of a different story. And sometimes those endings take time to say goodbye to. 

So look - here’s what I told the group of ladies I spoke to on Saturday.

You may be reading this thinking that my life isn’t that bad and I need to get over it.

You may be comparing my story to yours.

You may be thinking you’ve had it a million times harder than me and I know nothing.

That’s okay if you are thinking these thoughts.

In my experience, when people share struggles with other people, it can sometimes bring up the pain in the listener, who then wants to be validated for their own pain. If that’s the case, please give yourself that space.

A trusted friend.

A therapist.

A coach.

A journal.

All of the above, ideally. 

Pain happens to us all.

Grief and sadness is unavoidable.

I don’t know what you’ve been through, and I’m not in the comparison game. But here’s what gets me through the obstacles, challenges and darkness: gratitude.

Now, you are allowed to roll your eyes. 

I’d probably do the same.

I’ve kept a gratitude journal and practice for years and get annoyed when people tell me to start practicing gratitude. “Hiiii I already am!”

But hear me out! 

Something inside of me cracked open a little deeper into gratitude this summer. 

I understood it on a more intimate level.

I realized that gratitude is easy when you get a new car and just got a fat paycheck.

It’s easy when things are going the way you expected them to go.

But sis - how often do things ever actually go the way you expect? 🤣

Like. Not very often.

So gratitude really becomes real and true and deep when we learn to practice it in the midst of  challenges and frustrations.

When I taught this class in California some of the participants opened up to talking about infertility and infidelity.  Suddenly I’m the buffoon talking about gratitude in the midst of someone’s deep pain. 😳

But I know pain too.

And gratitude is that little tiny glimmer of hope.

A small spark, that if given a breath of air, can light a whole forest ablaze. 

🙏Honestly and truly, I would never have bought a building downtown and experienced owning my own home if it weren’t for my deep gratitude practice.

🙏Through lots of struggles moving back and not making progress on remodeling the barn I wanted to use, I stayed thankful and hopeful.

🙏When I got turned down for loans, I stayed grateful.

🙏When I had no down payment, I stayed hopeful.

Gratitude is what led me through. And no, life isn’t perfect with gratitude, but it sure is a lot sweeter. 

How Gratitude Helped Me Receive My Dream Building

Over the last 1.5 years I have been really working toward following my vision of remodeling my Dad’s barn and using it as a space to host art and yoga retreats. It seemed like no matter how many steps forward I would take, within moments I was always sliding right back down to ground zero. Still, I continued to pray, keep faith that this vision was meant for me and give thanks to the land, the barn, my ancestors and the spirit that was leading me.

After a series of events this summer I decided to walk away from the barn. It wasn’t flowing. I believed with all my heart that this would happen, but the timing was not right now.

So, I walked away from the barn and started looking at houses. Surely I could figure out a loan for a small house in my rural community, I thought. Within a week I was rejected by three loan offices, all of which were very easy to obtain loans, I had been told. But, because I was a business owner, my numbers were backward for what they wanted.

This would have been a great time to give up. 😬

I thought about it, to be honest! But instead of throwing in the towel, I dug my heals deeper into the ground. I started spouting off gratitude like it was an olympic sport.

“I’m so happy and grateful now that I have found the perfect place, at the perfect price!”

I’d say this on my daily walks and get sooooo amped up!!

Then there was this dream..

I’d been walking around telling everyone that the perfect place at the perfect price was waiting for me. I had journaled it, prayed it, spoke it…

And somewhere in there I received this dream. My angels vividly came to me in a dream and told me I was right. They did in fact have the perfect place for me at the perfect price - but they told me to wait for it, because it had to be from the perfect people. They explained that the energy behind the structure had to be pleasant or the whole thing would feel off to me.

The next day I woke up and kept on saying what I had been saying, only now I added on a little something at the end.

“I’m so happy and grateful now that I have found the perfect place, at the perfect price, from the perfect people!”

You know when you’re waiting for something how 2 days can feel like 5 years. Well it did, but in hindsight this all happened very very quickly - like in 3 weeks! 🫨

Rather than a house, a building downtown became available.

At first I was not at all interested. But then the owner texted me and told me to come have a look, so I did.

You know what — It was the perfect place, at the perfect price, from the perfect people!

Somehow all of these miracles came together, working for my best interest. I was able to put down a down payment and purchase the building without a loan. It’s a wild, crazy story.

When we made the deal, I was in the owner’s living room with him and his wife. After he agreed to my terms he and his wife said they just felt like the building was waiting for me to have it and that they knew God sent me for this building. I told them about my dream and we all teared up and then hugged. It truly was meant to be.

But had I been logical, realistic or negative — this never would have come to pass.

Gratitude truly is magic.

Gratitude in Hard Times

1. Name It to Tame It

When those tough times hit (and let's be real, they hit us all), the first step is to acknowledge what's happening. Don't shove those feelings down or pretend everything's okay. Instead, get real with yourself. Grab your journal, a piece of paper, or even just have a chat with yourself and name what's going on. What's the challenge? What emotions are swirling around inside you? Sometimes, simply putting words to our experiences can take away some of their power.

2. Shift Your Perspective

Okay, so you've acknowledged the tough stuff. Now, it's time to put on your detective hat and look for the hidden gems. Ask yourself:

• 📝What is this experience teaching me?

• 📝How is it helping me grow?

• 📝What strengths am I developing as I navigate this challenge?

Even in the midst of the mud, there are always lessons to be learned and opportunities for growth. Sometimes, it's just a matter of shifting our perspective to see them.

3. Find the Spark

This is where the magic of gratitude really comes in. Even when things feel heavy, there's always something to be thankful for. Maybe it's the support of a loving friend, the roof over your head, or even just the simple act of breathing.

Take a moment to appreciate the good stuff, no matter how small. These little sparks of gratitude can ignite a fire within you, giving you the strength and resilience to keep moving forward.

Remember, gratitude isn't about denying the challenges or pretending everything's perfect. It's about finding those glimmers of hope, even in the midst of the mess. And trust me, those glimmers are always there, waiting to be discovered.

Take some time to journal through this today and see what happens. You might actually surprise yourself. ✨

✨Free Download ✨

And, as a gift from me to you, I’d like to share my Gratitude Glow Up PDF with you for free.  This workbook is full of gratitude journaling prompts, the science behind gratefulness and more!  Download your free PDF journal here.

If you do use the workbook, I’d love to know how you liked it. Shoot me an email anytime. 

Today I’m thankful for you, being here, reading this. Choosing faith over fear.

I’m proud of you.

✨Keep sparkling.

Do you have your own magical gratitude story? Share your experiences with gratitude in the comments! 🫶🙏✨